You know when you are younger and adults assume you will be best friends with anyone who is the same age as you. The same thing happens when you are older and you are a man. My sister is trying to get me to be friends with her new boyfriend so keeps setting us up on man dates. Last week we went to a footy game. I don’t even really like sport, nor does he but we are men and we shall bond over football and beer. Apparently. Our next date has been arranged against my will, this time we are going on a boat! She has obviously told him he has to get in my good boo
ks because he keeps sending me boating themed emails. I am not sure the last time I expressed any boating enthusiasm to my sister. I like boats just as much as the next guy but I think he’s gone a little overboard in attempting to bond, he’s emailed me an article about the best boatcatch system released this year. I honestly had to google what a boatcatch system was, I replied with a simple ‘thanks man, see you on the water’. I once told my sister that I would like to buy a sailing boat when I retire and I think she took this to mean I love boats and want to spend a day on one with her dull boyfriend. I looked for excuses to get out of it and I even texted her a few days before saying I was starting to feel unwell. She is smart, she saw straight through my plot to bail on the man date and came round that night with medicines and tea and said I looked fine. I realised there was no hope of me being mates with this bloke when he emailed me about getting to the dock early to observe an outboard motor servicing. Melbourne is lively enough to come up with a better activity than watching boat repairs surely!